


Bruise Pristine

by Lilith_the_ancient



Category: Yu-Gi-Oh!
Genre: Angst, Consensual Violence, Dysfunctional Relationships, Fluff, M/M, POV Multiple, Self-Harm, Violence, mentions of child abuse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-05-15
Updated: 2012-08-07
Packaged: 2017-11-05 10:22:07
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 11,447
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/405344
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lilith_the_ancient/pseuds/Lilith_the_ancient
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Seto and Joey are stuck in a destructive relationship. Will they manage to overcome their pasts or will they destroy them?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Title is a Placebo song. The whole story was strongly influenced by Placebo's music.
> 
> No beta and quite old. I did not review it on purpose, because I would not be able to post it without completely rewriting it otherwise. It's not that I think the story is so terribly bad, it's more that my writing style has changed so much over the year, I can't really deal with my old writing. owever, I made a promise to post all of my work here and I'm keeping it.

/ Every step we take that's synchronized  
Every broken bone  
Reminds me of the second time  
That I followed you home/

 

(Placebo – The bitter end)

 

 

*Joey’s POV*

 

When I kick the door shut behind me, I’m immediately slammed against it. I know that tomorrow I’ll be covered in bruises, but I don’t really care. It’s nothing new. Well, that’s not totally true, I’m used to pain, with my dad beating me up the whole time, but this is different. This pain mixed with pleasure is what I want. No it’s what _we_ want, what we _need_.

 

I hear glasses breaking, I know he doesn’t care. He’ll just tell the maid that he was clumsy again, not that she’ll buy it, but she won’t say anything, because he’s her boss and it doesn’t matter what she thinks as long as he pays her enough to keep her mouth shut.

 

I feel his tongue plunge into my mouth, forcing his way in. I  want it there, but battle for dominance is what we do, not that I can beat him, he’s too strong, but I can always try. That’s why I grab his hair and give it a firm tug. He groans and I feel his hips grind against mine.

 

I find myself wondering how things got this way…

 

*It was a cold November evening and I needed something to work off my bad temper upon. At school I’d just got really bad grades and if that wasn’t enough, my dad had beaten the crap out of me for it. I felt like fighting. Maybe it sounds strange that you want to fight after someone had beaten you up, but at least this person I could hurt. I could pour my anger and rage on someone.

 

I was wandering the streets and somehow got to the rich neighborhood. I was about to turn back, when I saw someone familiar. Seto Kaiba sitting on a bench in front of his house, smoking a cigarette. Perfect.

 

I walked slowly past him, making sure he saw me, waiting for a sarcastic remark. I wasn’t disappointed.

 

“What brings a stray dog like you here?” I turned. Kaiba sounded genuinely irritated.

 

“Don’t call me a dog, you jerk!” I spit out. At that, I saw a smirk coming on his face and felt my blood start to boil.

 

“Aww, puppy isn’t happy then?” he continued, unaware of (or just ignoring?) the anger in my eyes.

 

“You call me a dog again and you’ll be sorry,” I growled. _Come on Kaiba. My fists are aching to connect with that perfect face of yours._

 

“Why are you outside anyway? Mokuba not letting you smoke inside?” That hit a nerve. The CEO jumped off the bench and came to stand in front of me. That was what I waited for. I stretched out my arms and shoved him backwards.

 

“Hey get away from me you creep!” Kaiba pushed me back so hard that I landed on my ass, then let out a dry laugh.

 

“Well, well, aren’t you a weak little puppy.”

 

He wasn’t prepared for my next action.

 

“I said,” I got ready for an attack, “DON’T CALL ME A DOG!” With that I launched myself at Kaiba, hitting him hard in the gut and sending us both to the ground.

 

The memory of what came then is a bit foggy. I don’t know how long we’ve fought or who started to kiss first, but it happened. And the first time we parted afterwards, I lay on my back on the couch with my shirt off, regaining my breath. He was doing the same, but between gasps, he managed to say: “You. Me. Bedroom. Now.”*

 

That’s how it always goes: we fight and then we fuck. Because you can’t call this love-making. We wouldn’t know how to do that, nor would we want to.

I feel his skin on my naked chest (Now when did that happen? I really have to start paying more attention) and am once again reminded how much we are alike. Same scars, same fears and the same rage.

 

You can say that I noticed our similarities in the morning, after that first night we spent together. Then Kaiba first saw the cuts on my arms and bruises on my body, and I saw his scars and cigarette burns. But I think it was earlier. When we first touched. Like some animal recognition. Like meeting an equal.

 

I’m turned over and my head is being slammed against his desk and I feel my nose start to bleed.

“That hurt you jerk!”

 

“Sorry,” but his voice betrays that he isn’t. I watch the crimson drop mingle with the others on the desk. Some old, some new, some bloodstains aren’t even recognizable anymore. Most of it Seto’s blood, because we’re in his room now.

 

I still remember the first time he showed it to me. I think it was a month after our first ‘encounter’ and it was the most romantic thing he ever did. Well, maybe romantic is a wrong word. Let’s say romantic in a very sick, twisted way, but still.

 

You see this room is what Kaiba likes to call his ‘room where he lets off steam’. It’s where he locks himself in when life is unbearable and the only thing that can ease the suffering is pain. There is a huge stereo to make sure Mokuba won’t suspect anything and further not too much furniture, otherwise it would just end up broken. I kind of envy him for having such a place. I only have my room to turn to and then I have to make sure I won’t break anything or make too much noise, because then my father will get angry and that’s never a good thing.

 

Seto starts to fumble with the fastenings of my jeans. _Oh no you don’t._ I push against the desk and in one fast movement I am turned around, facing him. _That’s better._ He’s slightly caught off guard by my action, but soon regains his composure and pushes me with my back on the desk.

 

Now why is this familiar? Oh yes, I once woke up on this desk with the CEO snuggling against me. Yes you heard it right: Seto Kaiba snuggles. He isn’t as bad as everyone thinks…I can’t believe I’m saying this…In the morning he can actually be nice. Then we just lie next to each other, enjoying the moment or on very rare occasions we even talk.

 

But this isn’t such a moment.

 

He backs up a bit to strip from his clothes (mine has once again miraculously disappeared) and I just have to check him out. You have to give the guy credit: he is gorgeous. Then he is back and all my rational thinking is gone out of the window. His hot skin is on mine, he spits into his hand and then with one push he is inside me. I let out a scream of passion and pain and dig my fingernails into his back. He groans and sets up a fast rhythm slamming ruthlessly into me, while simultaneously jerking me off. I have to be bleeding, but I don’t even care anymore.

 

He is too good at this and I’m caught off guard by the orgasm suddenly wrecking through my body. For a moment I see spots before my eyes and then darkness engulfs me.


	2. Chapter 2

/It takes the pain away

That could not make you stay

It's way to broke to fix  
No glue, no bag of tricks/

 

(Placebo – The crawl)  
  


 

*Seto’s POV*

 

I felt the early sun on my face and opened my eyes. Looking at the alarm clock on my nightstand, I saw it was only six in the morning. On a Saturday. Way too early to get up. I never needed much sleep. An old habit, I guess. In the orphanage I always stayed up until Mokuba was asleep. Later on, when we were adopted, I kept waking over him. Well, partly, Gozaburo never gave me much rest. Thinking of him still manages to make me flinch. And now having a company to run, I’m expected to be there 24/7. Even on Saturday. But not this early.

 

I feel a weight being placed on my stomach and realize it’s Joey’s arm. He’s still asleep of course. He hates getting up early, so when he sleeps over, I make sure I leave for work without waking him. A cranky Joey Wheeler isn’t a pretty sight.

 

I look over at my puppy and just can’t suppress a smile. No matter how big my bed is, he always manages to take up all the space. I prop myself up on my right arm and let my eyes wander over his face. He looks tired. And I think he has lost more weight, if that’s even possible. It took no effort at all to carry him up to my room yesterday after he fell asleep on the table. Well, passed out is a better word.

 

I know he hates it when I call him a dog, but he resembles a puppy in so many ways it’s impossible to ignore. A streetwise, broken little puppy. And I know I can’t fix him.

 

Maybe I’m a bad person, because I don’t think I even want to fix him. If he’d be alright, then he probably wouldn’t want to be with me anymore. Because I can’t be fixed. I couldn’t even help myself back then, so how can I save him now?

 

Back in the days when Gozaburo still lived, my life was hell. All the sick things he did to me I allowed. I’d never stood up against him or disagreed. I just let it happen. I was weak, a pathetic excuse for a boy. Joey is stronger than I was then; he stands up to his dad, he’s not a trembling heap of human waste on the floor like I was. I admire him for that, though I’d never say it to him, and I guess I’m jealous of it too.

 

I wonder how it would have been if Gozaburo didn’t make that mistake years ago. He made the fatal mistake of hitting my brother. It was just a light slap on the cheek, but it made something inside of me snap. No one touches my brother. He’s the world to me. He is the only thing that has kept me sane all those years. So that day, my feelings just kind of froze and every preparation I took was made in total calmness.

 

I don’t remember the glass breaking, nor the scream, the only things I remember are his eyes when he looked at me, falling down. Finally, the horrible understanding, and I even thought seeing a glimpse of regret there. My own face showed no emotions at all.

 

Then I went home, opened the door to Mokuba’s room and looking at his peacefully sleeping form, I felt the emotions finally take control of me. I cried the whole night, curled up in a ball next to my little brother. I cried all the blue out of my eyes, so all left now is ice. After that, I never cried again.

 

That’s why most people think I’m cold and that I don’t care about anything. Maybe that is the truth, but there’s something about my puppy that caught my eye. I can’t call it love or even care, because I don’t care about anything other than Mokuba and KaibaCorp, that’s a rule I live by, but maybe it’s recognition, in some way he reminds me of myself, my former self that is, and lust, there is definitely lust between us.

 

I turn and wrap my arms around him, pulling him closer. I nuzzle my head in his hair (how does he manage to smell so good after everything we’ve done yesterday?) and decide to try and get some more sleep.


	3. Chapter 3

*Seto’s POV*

 

“Damn Joey, you really are pathetic! How can you let him walk over you like this? I guess you really are nothing but a little, defenseless puppy after all.”

 

I haven’t seen Joey for almost two weeks and now he’s standing in my doorway again, looking worse than ever. Skinny, face bruised and swollen, dirty (probably from running). I pity him, but I don’t say it, because it’s not what he wants to hear.

 

“Shut up Kaiba,” he growls. I move away from the door and let him in. “I don’t wanna talk.”

 

You never do. Something in the way he looks sends a pang right through my heart. What’s this? I’m not starting to develop feelings for the punk, am I? It’s true that he doesn’t want to talk, but he wants something else and I’m the person to give him that.

We walk upstairs in silence heading to my room.

“It’s quiet, where’s everyone?”

 

“Well, Mokuba’s out to a friend and the staff has a day off,” I explain.

 

“Good.” I see him hide away a grin. That isn’t a good sign.

 

“What are you laughing about?”

 

“Nothin’”

 

“Yeah right,” I snort. “And what about the whole I don’t want to talk thing? What you call this then? Barking?”

 

I wasn’t prepared for what happened next: Joey grabbed me by my shirt, yanked the door open, pulled us inside, slammed it shut, and pushed me against it.

 

“Shut up,” he hisses inches from my face, “Or I’ll make you.”

 

Whoa! I didn’t know he was so wound up. I think that had really hit a sore spot. But that’s ok. I want him to lose it. Then he gives me all of him and, I smirk, it’s easier to control him like this.

 

But suddenly he is backed away from me and is just staring. His look makes me feel uncomfortable, I’m starting to think there’s something wrong today. My puppy never acted this strange before.

 

 

*Joey’s POV*

 

I know what he’s trying to do, but I won’t let him. Losing my composure is very easy and most of the time pleasant, but today I have other plans. Right now the blue-eyed wonder has figured out that something’s wrong, because he’s staring at me. Better not keep him waiting then.

 

I lean in and ravish his mouth with my tongue. At the same time I slowly start to guide him towards the bed. He wraps his hands around me and rolls his hips against mine. I suppress the need to take him right there and then and stifle a moan. He isn’t the only one who has missed this. But if I give in now, my plan would be ruined.

I finally manage to get him on the bed and pin him down, sitting astride him.

 

*Seto’s POV*

 

What is the pup trying to do? For the first time I don’t get him. First he seemed tired and angry and now he’s grinning like an idiot. He has pinned me down on the bed and is…yes, what _is_ he doing anyway? It looks like he’s searching for something in his pocket. I see a glimpse of metal and then he holds the object up. I gulp and feel myself harden even more against my will. In the dim light I see a shiny pair of handcuffs. Now how did the punk manage to get hold of them and, more important, what is he planning to do with them?

 

“So Seto, wanna play a game with me?”

 

His voice is deep and rough from arousal, there’s nothing that can turn me on more than that. He bends down and, lifting up my shirt, starts to lick my chest. Ok scratch my last thought; this turns me on even more. His teeth graze my nipple and I loose my focus. Suddenly my shirt is off and my wrists are pinned above my head. I hear a soft click. Not fully understanding the meaning of it until I try to move my hands. Shit. The fucker cuffed me!

 

“Hey!”

 

Joey is still straddling my waste and laughing like an idiot.

 

“Relax Kaiba, just enjoy the ride.”

 

“Fuck you!”

 

“Hmm, tempting, but no thanks, I have other plans.”

 

I grind my teeth in annoyance. I can’t stand being helpless like this, but a part of me, a more perverted part, I think, is curious as to where this is going. He lets his hands trail my down chest, agonizingly slow. He knows exactly what my sensitive spots are and uses them shamelessly. I groan as he pinches my nipples, not hard enough to cause real pain, but enough to make me crazy.

 

“Puppy, stop teasing!”

 

“Don’t call me a dog. I really don’t recommend it in a position like this.”

 

*Joey’s POV*

 

I lean down and lick his stomach. Hmm, tasty. I move up again and admire my work. A half naked CEO with a lustful and questioning expression is looking back at me. Damn, the guy is hot. I could take him just now, but I don’t think he’d appreciate that. Wait, since when do I care about what he thinks? Why is it suddenly my main goal to please _him_? Am I falling in love? I shake my head to dismiss this kind of thoughts and concentrate my full energy on the nice view below me.

 

Very slowly I drag my nails over his arms and chest, feeling him shiver with pleasure. Just what I guessed: Seto has a little masochistic side to him as well. I wonder how far I can take it? Ah well, let’s find out.

 

I move closer and teasingly bite his lip. He rears up, as far as the handcuffs let him, and captures my mouth. I participate eagerly, not allowing him to get control, until we are both out of breath. My pants are suddenly too tight and quickly, I rid myself of my clothes. Seto eyes me up shamelessly.

 

“Like what you see?” In answer he just licks his lips.

 

I decide to tease him a bit more and let, closing my eyes, my hand wander over my naked body. I hear his breath quicken and feel him writhe under me. That’s it Kaiba, loose it. I move my mouth over his body, inches from his skin, enough to let him feel my breath, but not touching. Reaching his pants, I take them off. He’s not wearing underwear, figures. Now I do touch his skin, but make sure to avoid his straining cock.

 

“Stop this torment!”

 

He can’t take it anymore. That’s my cue to action. I lay on top of him, grinding our groins together and as he gasps in surprise, I push two of my fingers in his mouth. He sucks on them without thinking.

 

*Seto’s POV*

 

“Stop this torment!”

 

 I’m getting pretty frustrated from al this teasing. I’m denied my release for too long. Then he’s suddenly on top of me, the sensation is overwhelming and I gasp from the intense contact. Immediately I feel his fingers inside my mouth. Glad that I can participate in something, I eagerly start to suck on them. Then the fingers are gone, moving downward, I finally understand what this is all about.

 

“Don’t,” I warn him.

 

I won’t let him do this to me. I won’t allow him. No one has ever taken me, except one, but that I’m trying hard to forget, and no one ever will.

 

“Just relax Seto, I won’t hurt you, well at least not in a way you don’t want to be hurt.”

 

Shit, this is bad, I can’t move my arms at all and he’s stronger than I expected.

 

“I…said…stop!”

 

“I don’t think you want me to.”

Damned smartass!

 

“Puppy!”

Slap! I didn’t see that one coming. He’s just slapped me in the face! I can’t believe it. And an other thing, why the hell is it making me more aroused? I think that there’s seriously something wrong with me.

 

“I told you not to call me a dog, haven’t I?”

 

Before I can yell at him or at least have a witty comeback, his lips are on mine in a bruising kiss, so intense, that I almost miss his finger entering me, almost. The feel of it, isn’t very pleasant and I fight to keep away the memories. Another finger is pushed inside me and I clench my eyes shut.

 

“Seto…” I faintly hear his voice and try to focus on understanding what he’s saying. “Seto, open your eyes, relax, it’s me, say my name please.”

I open my eyes and see his concerned, but pretty and warm smile. I relax a little more, allowing him to enter another finger. The he crooks them and a white hot sensation rushes through me.

 

“Joey!” I call out his name, because yes, it’s him, not my stepfather or any one else, but my golden haired puppy, who is now giving me intense pleasure.

 

The fingers are gone and we are both panting.

 

“Say it again, say you want me, say my name Seto Kaiba.”

 

“Yes, I want you, fuck, Joey, now, I want you now!”

And with one thrust he’s inside me, filling me up. All thoughts are gone from me, except his name that I keep repeating over and over again as he fucks me into the mattress.

 

It’s over too soon and he collapses on top of me after we both climax. I find myself thinking: why the hell haven’t we done this before?

 

I see his eyelids become heavy and realize that he’s almost asleep.

 

“Ehm, Joey?”

 

“Yeah?” comes the sleepy answer.

 

I rattle the cuffs against the headboard. “You mind?”

 

His eyes grow a bit wider and he sits up. “Sorry.” He smiles sheepishly and starts going through his pockets until he retrieves a small silver key. Releasing me, he kisses my slightly bruised wrists. I wrap my arms around his slender waist and pull him closer.

 

“Joey?”

 

“Yes?”

 

“I was wondering, where did you get those handcuffs?”

 

“That’s an old story. I think I was eleven years old. It had been one of the first times my dad beat me up. He was drunk and roughed me up pretty badly. A neighbor saw it and called the police. They took us away: my dad to sleep on it in a jail cell and me to talk. They asked me if I wanted to stay with my dad or go to an orphanage. I decided to stay. It was the first time my father was arrested, so they couldn’t just take me away against my will.

 

The officer, who was put in charge over me, was very nice. He stayed with me the whole night, explaining that the both sides weren’t great: he had been raised in an orphanage himself, so he knew that could be hell, but he also warned me that my dad might continue to hit me.

 

I remember that he was very handsome and had a warm voice. I think that he was the first man I felt attracted to. Maybe not fully understanding that then. I was interested in his job, I mean, when you’re eleven, meeting a real cop is totally cool. So I kept asking him about his work and when I had to go home, he gave me these,” Joey raised the cuffs he was still holding in his hand, “as a good-bye gift. Needless to say I was thrilled. And look, they did come in handy!” he smirked.

 

I slapped him playfully on the head and he stuck out his tongue. Then he closed his eyes and snuggling up against me, he fell asleep. Just watching him like this makes me feel warm inside. What does this mean? What are my feelings for him exactly?


	4. Chapter 4

Joey felt restless. It had been five days since he’d seen Seto for the last time and he just couldn’t stop thinking about him. He was pacing through his room, trying to collect his thoughts. Since a day or two he’d found new feelings inside for the blue-eyed CEO. Affection? Care? Love, maybe? He wasn’t sure and the uncertainty was driving him crazy.

He made a frantic turn and ended up knocking a glass off his table.

 

“Oh man, just my luck!”

 

Joey kneeled down to pick up the broken glass. He hated his own clumsiness. His dad needed only the slightest reason to beat him and he always managed to provide it.  Now that he thought about it, people he cared about always seemed to hurt him the most. His mother, who just took off one day, taking his sister, the most important person in his life, with her. That day his dad got really drunk for the first time and hurt him. Such things could really make you reconsider everything you knew and thought to be true. From that day on, Joey decided not to let anyone get that close again. Never love.

 

Thinking that, he unconsciously gripped a piece of glass tighter, not feeling a trail of blood trickle down his hand. And now there was Seto. The worst possible person to fall in love with. A coldhearted man, who cared about nothing and no one, except himself and maybe his little brother. And besides that, the CEO was the only person, who Joey thought to be even more screwed up than he himself was. Why did he have to fall for someone who for sure would never love him back?

 

Thinking about it, he wasn’t aware of the fact that he’d started to slowly drag the piece of glass over his left wrist. Only noticing it when he hit a small vein and the bleeding increased. Then he got up and went to the bathroom to get a bandage. During that he made a decision. He would go to Seto and stop this, whatever it was between them, before it got out of hand. Before he would really fall in love.

***

 

*Joey’s POV*

A servant opened the door, when I rang the bell. I walked inside the big hall, immediately hearing music from a door on my right. At least if you can call death-metal on the highest volume music. Seto’s ‘special’ room. Without even touching the doorknob, I knew the door was locked. And knocking had no use, because he wouldn’t hear it over the noise anyway. Besides, he would be very pissed, should someone bother him in there, unless it was an emergency.

 

I placed my right hand on the door and leaned against it. Trying to imagine Seto in there, probably doing the same thing I did a couple of hours ago. I sighed, reminding myself what I came here to do. I turned around and entered the living room..

 

At first I didn’t notice anything unusual, but then I heard soft sobs coming from the couch and moving closer, I saw Mokuba sitting there with his knees pulled up, crying softly. It was a bit of a shock, seeing the normally chipper, energetic and kind boy in tears. I felt the urge to protect him, not only because he was Seto’s little brother, but also because I like the kid myself. He reminded me of my sister. I walked over to the couch and sat next to Mokuba. He looked up at me with slightly swollen eyes.

 

“Hey Mokuba, wanna tell me what’s wrong?”

 

The boy sighed and wiped at his eyes.

 

“It’s Seto. I can’t stand what he’s doing to himself. He thinks I don’t know, but I do. I know what’s happening in that room,” Mokuba pointed absently in that direction. “I mean, I know that his life was tough, but hey, mine too, you know. But hurting yourself is not a solution, he’s only making things worse. I just can’t understand why even now…” The young boy looked as if he was lost in his thoughts for a moment. Then he seemed to remember me again and started to talk. “I just can’t seem to help…” His voice faded, but then, unexpected, his eyes lit up, looking at me and he suddenly grabbed my left arm. I flinched and stifled a cry, because I felt some of my wounds reopen, but luckily Mokuba didn’t notice.

 

“You can help him!” he exclaimed. I was a bit confused. What did the boy mean? Why me? “You are the only one who makes him smile, you can make him happy.” Me? Do I make Seto smile? Well yeah sometimes, but it’s nothing more than a smirk. “You are the only one who can get through his barriers, because he cares so much about you!” SAY WHAT?! Kaiba cares about me? Since when? What did I miss? “Joey, do you love…”

 

Then his eyes widened and he stopped talking. His smile faded and he looked…what? Scared? Disgusted? I followed his gaze and saw, that he was looking at my arm, that had started to bleed and the crimson fluid was now drenching my sleeve.

 

“Mokuba…I…” But the boy was already backing away from me, with a shocked expression on his face.

 

“You…you, you are just the same!” The dark haired boy called out and then he jumped to his feet. I tried to calm him down, but it was no use. Mokuba didn’t want to listen.

 

 ***

 

*Seto’s POV*

As I open the door I hear voices in the living room. Listening closer I hear Mokuba and…is that Joey? What is the mutt doing here? I’m really not in the mood to see him today. Those idiots who are supposed to work for me, screwed it all up today. It’s really frustrating to depend on people, be it only your employees. So why is it today that the puppy choose to visit? Ah well, maybe we can have some fun after all. He isn’t that bad to have around, I smirk, or underneath.

 

But the scene I find in the living room is not at all what I expected. They stand looking at each other. Mokuba is yelling and Joey…is he bleeding? What the hell is going on here?

 

“…just the same! I thought you were different. I thought you could help us.” I hear Mokuba sob a couple of times before he continued. He now sees me too.

 

“Honestly, what’s wrong with you people?! Why are you doing this to yourself and each other? It’s clear to see that you love each other!” What? Is he talking about the mutt and me? Love? That’s ridiculous! “Why do you both have to play tough all the time? You could make each other happy, if only you were prepared to see! Why are you both so fucking blind?!” This is the first time I heard Mokuba swear and I’ve never seen him this distressed before either. Knowing that I’m the cause of it, makes me feel very guilty and ashamed. His tears run freely over his face and he doesn’t even attempt to wipe them away anymore.

 

“I just can’t turn away anymore from what I see. You,” he placed his piercing eyes on me, “are my brother. The most important person in my life. You’re everything to me. I love you so much.” His gaze then turns to Joey. “And you, you are a friend for who I got to care a lot lately. What do you think your behavior is doing to me?” That last comment was meant for us both and was spoken more quietly. I try to reach out a hand to sooth him a little, but my hand gets slapped away.

 

“Mokuba…” Joey tries. His attempt fails too. My brother turns around on his heels and stomps off to the stairs. I try to follow me but he doesn’t let me.

 

“I don’t want to talk to you. It’s no use anyway. Why don’t you for once try to solve your problems, instead of running away for them?” With that he reaches the top of the stairs and I hear his door slam shut.

 

I sigh and turn to face Joey. For a moment I am angry at him, for starting this whole thing, but when I see the look in his eyes, I realized he is just as upset about this as I am. We stand there for a moment in an awkward silence.

 

“Uhm…maybe I should…”

 

“It’s ok, go to Mokuba, your brother needs you right now.”

 

“But don’t you need a bandage or something?”

 

“Nah, I’ll be fine.”

 

“You sure about that?” He doesn’t look that stable on his feet.

 

“Yes, I’m positive. Go. I’ll let myself out.”  He forces a smile and nudges me in the direction of the stairs. Then, when I slowly start to climb the staircase, I hear the front door close.

 

***

 

I stand in front of my brother´s door and hesitate. What am I supposed to say? Hmm, apologize first, I think. I raise my hand and softly knock on the door. When I don’t get an answer, I knock again, this time louder.

 

“Go away,” comes the reply. This is going to be hard. Mokuba doesn’t get upset easily, but when it happens, there are no words that can change his state. I lean against the door, and then slide down to sit on the floor. The events of the day have finally taken their toll.

 

“Mokuba…please don’t shut me out. I need to talk to you about this,” I swallow. “I’m really sorry.” There seems to be a shifting in the room, I suspect that my brother got closer to the door, he is probably in the same position as me now.

 

“Go on.”

 

“Since when do you know about, ehm, what I…do?” I’ve always tried so hard not to let my younger brother notice, but it now seems he had known all along.

 

“Some time. About the recent stuff at least. Back then, I knew too. I just was too young to do anything, and now I wish I had. I feel guilty that I knew what he was doing to you and never interfered.” I jump to my feet and yank the door open. What I had expected turns out to be right; Mokuba has been sitting against the door and now he topples to the floor. I scoop him up in my arms and hug him tightly.

 

“Please don’t say that, you couldn’t do a thing. You shouldn’t feel guilty. I tried my best to protect you. To let you have a happy childhood, the one I never had. But now I see I have failed.”

 

“You didn’t fail, I was happy, you’ve given me everything and more. But you should know that you don’t have to carry your burden alone, I know what you feel. I want to help you, at least now, but you’re shutting me out and that makes me feel so helpless.”

 

I pull him closer to me, running my hands over his back soothingly. He has been so brave, and I didn’t even know. Why was I so blind?

 

“I don’t know what to say,” I confess.

 

“Tell me why. Why you do this to yourself still?”

 

“I don’t know. It helps sometimes, I guess. Takes the pain away, however ironic that may sound. I got used to it. Sometimes when I feel all alone, it gives a sort of a ‘safe’ feeling.”

 

“But you don’t have to do that to feel safe, to release your tension and pain. You have to talk to someone, not keep it all inside. You have me…and Joey”

 

“The mutt?”

 

“Don’t call him that! He cares about you.”

 

“How do you know?”

 

“Just as I know that you love him.”

 

“What?! I don’t…”

 

“Yes you do. You are my brother, Seto, I know you, I can read you. I know better that anyone else when you’re happy, sad, or angry. And I definitely can tell when you’re in love. Even if you don’t know it yourself.”

 

I feel a blush coming up. Is it true? Am I in love with the puppy? It does feel kind of good when he’s around, I’ve smiled more often lately and the sex…well let’s say that’s pretty good. But love? When you like even someone’s annoying habits, is it love? When you are happy to see them, is it love? When you flinch when they’re hurt, is it love? Then the realization hits me: whatever I feel for the puppy, it´s something I’ve never felt for anyone else before. But does he feel the same?

 

I am roused from my thoughts, by Mokuba’s voice.

 

“What?”

 

His eyes light up mischievously. “You were thinking about Joey weren’t you?”

 

“I…err, why do you think so?”

 

“You’ve got that whole dazed and confused look on your face. Besides, you were blushing. What exactly were you thinking? Having a fantasy about the guy? Should I leave the room?” Mokuba teases. I feel my cheeks burn.

 

“What happened to my sweet, innocent brother?”

 

Then I realize something. “How did you know about us anyway? How did you know we…”

 

“…were sleeping together?” he finishes.

 

“Uhm, yes.”

 

“It’s pretty clear. The way you look at each other and the way you act when the other is around.”

 

“So you’re saying that Joey…ehh …cares about me?”

 

“Yes, I’d say that you should go to him now and explain how you feel.” Then his eyes turn serious. “Seto, don’t you lose him. I think he might be the best thing that ever happened to you. Go to him, please. If not for yourself than do it for me.”

 

I try to tell him that now isn’t the time, nor the occasion, but he won’t listen. So before I know what is happening I am sitting in the car, heading to Joey’s house. What? I’m not weak! Little brothers can be very persistent.

 

Somehow I’ve gotten to his address and am standing in the hall in front of the door to his apartment. Suddenly I’m very nervous and the whole thing doesn’t seem a good idea at all.


	5. Chapter 5

Joey moved through the house. He had run the whole distance from the Kaiba mansion to his own apartment just to avoid thinking about the events that had just taken place. But now he was home, alone and there was nowhere left to run. He was totally confused. The things Mokuba had said kept on playing in his head. He wasn’t even sure if he believed everything. The black haired boy had spoken of care, love even, but was he right? He did of course know his brother better that anyone else did, but could he know his feelings?

 

He kicked against the small heater in the corner of the room, hoping it would produce at least a little bit warmth, but instead it made a rattling sound and died on him. Joey cursed and drew the coat he was still wearing closer to his shivering body. It was February and colder than it usually got in Domino city. He kneeled down, looking whether he could fix the blasted thing before his drunken father would be back and blame him for it breaking down. But before he could do anything, he heard the doorbell. Wondering who it might be, he rose to his feet and walked to the door. Opening the door, Joey was dumbstruck. On his doorstep stood the CEO of Kaiba Corp himself. Not only was it strange that he had come by so late in the evening, but  it was also the first time Seto came over to his house, ever.

 

“Aren’t you going to let me in?”

 

“Ehm,…yeah sure, sorry, come in.” The blonde scratched his head, stepped away from the door and let the brunette in. Closing the door, he led Seto into the tiny living room, expecting jokes about the mess or the size of the place, but Kaiba was surprisingly quiet. They sat down on the couch in silence.

 

“Ehm, do you want something to drink?”

 

“No thank you, I’m good.”

 

“Sooooo,…did you talk it out with Mokuba?”

 

“Yes, we talked.”

 

“Is he ok?”

 

“Yeah, he’ll be fine.”

 

“Good”

 

They sat in silence, Joey staring at Seto and Seto…just staring into nothingness. At some point, when the silence got really uncomfortable, Joey asked what he was wondering about since he opened the door.

“So, ehm, Kaiba, why did you come over here?”

 

“I wanted to know why you came around earlier.” He lied.

 

“You mean today?”

 

“Yes.”

 

Joey wasn’t sure what to say, but he figured that this was the best moment to talk, so he might as well tell the truth.

“I came to break off, whatever thing we have,” he confessed. Seto’s eyes shot up to his and for a moment the blonde saw hurt and a small trace of fear. Then the expression was gone and Kaiba’s icy gaze was back in his eyes.

 

“Is that what you still want? Break up?”

 

The blonde buried his face in his hands and sighed deep. “I don’t know Seto. I just don’t know.” Silence fell between them once again. Then Joey said with a trembling voice: “ I’m scared I guess.”

 

“Of me?” Seto’s voice was softer than normal and he was fumbling with his scarf. In his perfectly cut suit and jacket he looked horribly out of place on the tiny shabby couch.

 

“No, yes. I’m scared of my feelings for you. Because every time I get to care about someone, they leave me, or hurt me or they hurt me and then leave.”

 

Seto stretched out a hand, wishing to go through his puppy’s golden locks, but then let it fall down, unsure what to do.

“I can’t promise you that I’ll never hurt you, but I can say that I will never leave you, if you don’t want me to.”

 

“Why?”

 

“Because I care about you.”

 

Joey’s head shot up and he looked straight into the now warm blue eyes. “W…what did you say?”

 

“I said I care about you. You stupid, good for n…”

 

His words were cut off by Joey’s lips and they shared a passionate kiss. Then they slowly backed away from each other, not really sure what to do next.

 

“So now what?” The blonde asked.

 

“I don’t know. What about trying something normal for a change? Come over for dinner tomorrow, I’m sure Mokuba would love that.” He paused. “And I wouldn’t mind either.”

 

“Sure, great. What time?”

 

“Ehm, around eight?”

 

“I’ll be there.”

 

“What would you like to eat?” Joey just grinned. “Oh, right, I forgot. Joey Wheeler and food, I guess it doesn’t really matter what it is, as long as there’s plenty of it.”

 

The blonde stuck out his tongue, but had to admit that Kaiba was right.

 

***

 

Joey rang the bell of the Kaiba mansion five minutes past eight. He was ready at six and very close to the house at seven, but he didn’t want to seem overeager, which, if he’d be honest, he was. The door swung open almost immediately and on the doorstep stood Seto, dressed in black, lose fitting, wool pants and a lose, black sweater with the sleeves pulled up, looking totally amazing.

 

“Come on in,” the brunette said, trying to sound nonchalant and failing. “I really don’t know what we’re eating, because Mokuba insisted on arranging the diner and wouldn’t have a no for an answer.” Joey grinned. He knew how persistent the kid could be sometimes. 

“Wow, did Mokuba cook?”

 

The CEO gave him a sarcastic smirk. “He is twelve years old and spoiled as all hell. As much as I love my little brother, I wouldn’t dare eating anything he would make.”

 

“I heard that,” came a cheerful voice and then the teen walked into the hall. “Hey Joey.”

 

“Yo Mokuba.”

 

“Well, come on you two, everything is ready.”

The black haired boy led them into a small room, only lit by candles and the fireplace in the corner. In the middle of the room was a beautifully set table.

 

“Wow,” uttered Joey. He was stunned by the look of it and touched that Mokuba would put so much effort into setting up the room. They walked inside and sat down.

The teen leaned down and nudged the blonde. “Doesn’t brother look good this evening? It only took him the whole day to decide what to wear.”

 

“Mokuba!” But the teen was already out of the door.

He returned soon with a trail full of food. When they saw the dishes, they were both surprised that Mokuba had made the servants prepare their favorite food.

“How did you kn…” started Joey, but was cut off by the younger Kaiba.

 

“I have a good memory and you talk about food a lot,” he explained. “Now enjoy your dinner and take your time, because you both ain’t leaving here until you have some sort of a conversation and get to know each other better.” He turned to leave, but then added: “I mean not only physically.” He winked and rushed out of the room. At the same moment Seto jumped out of his chair and raced to the door, that fell shut in front of his nose. Joey looked at him dumbfound and asked mockingly: “Ehm, sudden fit of claustrophobia?”

The CEO just glared at him, but was secretly surprised that the mutt knew the word and even pronounced it right.

 

“For your information, Mokuba has just locked the door and we are stuck in here for indefinite amount of time.”

 

“Oh.” They were quiet for a moment, looked at each other and burst out in a fit of laughter. It was the first time the both boys could laugh so carefree in months. Done laughing, Seto moved from the door and sat down at the table again.

 

The dinner was very pleasant and to their surprise they could easily find topics that they were both interested in to talk about. It was getting late already, when suddenly Joey started to feel strange. The room seemed to grow bigger and then to shrink. He shook his head, but that only made him nauseous. He asked to be excused and stood up. Now if only the room would stop spinning, he would be able to go to the bathroom. Turning a bit he grasped the doorpost and saw Seto look concerned at him. The brunette’s lips were moving, but it seemed as if someone had turned down the volume, because the blonde couldn’t hear the words. Then he faintly heard his own name being called out, when suddenly everything went dark.


	6. Chapter 6

Seto was pacing back and forth in the waiting room. His fists clenched. He hated hospitals; they made him feel helpless. You couldn’t do a thing, just wait. He turned around, probably for a thousandth time that hour, but this time he saw the doctor coming his way. He was a tall, middle aged man with dark hair that constantly fell in his face. He nodded Seto to follow him. They entered a small room with a desk and a couple of chairs. Sitting down the doctor took a file from his map and asked Kaiba to sit down.

 

“You are a friend of Joey Wheeler?” Seto nodded.

 

“He is asleep right now, you can visit him if you want to, but first I’d like to talk to you.

He has a concussion, bruised ribcage, some bruising, severe blood loss; the usual. Joey is a regular visitor here. He always tells that he has fallen or got into a fight or something, but his injuries practically scream: child abuse. And according to the cuts on his wrists he punishes himself for it. I don’t know how good you know his situation or whether you can help him or not, but I think that if nothing will change in his life soon, he won’t survive it. One more head injury can be fatal for him.”

 

The doctor paused letting his words sink in and seeing the shocked expression on Kaiba’s face he was satisfied that the teen obviously did care about his patient.

“But that’s not the only problem. He’s also mentally a mess. He balances on the edge of mental breakdown. I know that he has this tough, streetwise kid attitude, but underneath he’s very confused and scared. I’m sorry that I have to burden you with this information, but I didn’t really know who else to turn to. No one has visited him before or cared to stick around while he was unconscious. You seem to care. Besides, I know who you are, Seto Kaiba. You’ve got money and power. If there is someone who can save Joey, it’s you. ”

 

He opened the door and led a shocked Seto to the room where Joey was.

 

“You can go in and stay as long as you like, but we gave him strong tranquilizers, so he’ll probably sleep until tomorrow afternoon.”

 

Then the doctor headed back to his office. But before he went inside, he was called by a nurse, who had been listening to his conversation with Kaiba.

“What the hell was that? You scared the boy stiff! And it’s not even the truth. Joey Wheeler isn’t borderline, he recovered well.”

 

“Well, I’m sorry, but you know what? I like the kid and I think it’ll be the damn time if someone would finally notice his problems. Kind of a shock therapy.” He winked at the stunned nurse and went into his office.

 

****

 

Seto carefully opened the door and looked inside. What he saw, hurt him even more than the doctor’s words. He saw his lover lying in a bed that was too big for his small frame, a bandage around his head, skin as pale as the sheets and an infuse in his arm. He looked so fragile, small and so very young. In a sudden vision the CEO saw him lying in a coffin. Dead and gone. He paled and moved closer, sitting down next to the bed. He gently took the blonde’s hand and felt for the pulse, just to be sure he was alive. Then he bent down and kissed his palm. He kept his head bowed and whispered:

“Don’t you die, don’t you dare leave me, not now I’ve finally managed to love someone.” When he kissed Joey’s hand again, he tasted salt and noticed that it were his own tears. He looked at the hand, with a stunned expression. He hadn’t cried in years, didn´t even think that he was able to cry anymore, but apparently he had been wrong.

 

****

 

Joey slowly started to regain consciousness. Everything was still blurry and he had no idea where he was and what had happened. Then he remembered Seto’s concerned face and came to the conclusion that he had fainted. ‘Well that’s embarrassing. Better get up, before Kaiba’ll get worried,’ he thought. But then he noticed that he wasn’t at Seto’s. White ceiling, white sheets, funny smell; this had to be a hospital. Then he finally got aware of another presence in the room. He turned his head and saw Kaiba, well at least the upper side of his head. Joey felt a kiss being place on his hand and wanted to tell the CEO he was awake, but then Seto started to talk.

 

“Don’t you die, don’t you dare leave me, not now I’ve finally managed to love someone.” The sentence surprised Joey and he shut his eyes, pretending to be still asleep, but inside he was all mushy. He had never expected Kaiba to say that he loved him. It felt good to finally know for sure that the brunette cared. For a moment he was wondering when to show the CEO that he was awake, but then the pills kicked in again and he fell asleep.

 

****

 

Seto stayed all night with Joey. Leaving only once to call Mokuba and explain the situation. He managed to keep himself awake until morning, but somewhere around eight am the tiredness and stress finally took its toll and the brunette fell asleep.

 

He was awoken by a male voice.

“And you are?”

 

Kaiba yawned and opened his eyes. In the doorway he saw a middle aged man, looking annoyed. “I can ask you the same question,” he bit back. His neck hurt from sleeping in an awkward position and he had a hell of a bad mood. He already disliked the man who had woken him up.

 

“I’m Joey’s father. Now who the hell are you?” The man was irritated too.

 

The CEO shot up straight, all sleepiness forgotten. Fists clenched, he slowly rose from his seat. Kaiba walked over to the man, until they were on eye-level. “My name is Seto Kaiba. Would you please care to step outside for a moment, we need to talk.” His words were polite, but his voice was icy cold and the look in his eyes could’ve easily sent the meanest dog crawling away with the tail between its legs. The blonde man felt uneasy under that stare, especially now that he knew who he had against him. So he complied and walked into the hall, followed closely by the brunette.

 

“How dare you coming here, playing the concerned father?” Hissed the CEO the minute the door fell shut behind him.

 

“Are you telling me I can’t visit my own son in the hospital?”

 

“You can’t, not after it was you who put him there!” Kaiba was getting more and more angry. When at first he had been annoyed with the man, now he just plain hated him.

 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

 

“I bet you do, but you’ll just say you were too drunk to remember.”

 

 “Who do you think you are to be accusing me of this? I don’t need this. Now if you'll excuse me, I’m going to see my son.”

 

But Seto begged to differ; he grabbed Joey’s father by his arm and held him in place, his nails digging hard in the man’s flesh. “You’re not going anywhere, you son of a bitch!”

 

The man pulled his arm out of Kaiba’s tight grip and shoved him backwards. That wasn’t a good idea, because the CEO immediately planted his fist in the man’s gut, causing him to double over. He swung again, but his hand stopped in mid-air, when he heard a familiar voice.

 

“Seto stop!”

 

The brunette spun around, totally forgetting the man he was about to hit, to look at the person leaning against the doorframe. Joey seemed to be barely able to stand on his feet and his skin was still extremely pale. He was very drowsy from the tranquilizers and his ribs hurt. Kaiba rushed up to support him and the blonde reluctantly leaned into his embrace.

 

“What are you doing out of bed? Are you trying to kill yourself?”

 

“What the hell are you doing? Trying to kill my dad?” They reached the bed and Seto helped him to lie down again. Joey’s father leaving, embarassed and beaten.

 

“I’m sorry, I got a bit carried away, I think.”

 

“You bet you did!”

 

“Well, I’m terribly sorry, but it was you I was trying to protect!”

 

“I don’t need your protection. I can handle my own business,” the blonde growled and turned away from the CEO.

 

“Yeah, and you’re doing such a great job, look where it got you,” came the sarcastic reply.

 

Joey snorted. “Well, violence isn’t an answer either.”

They were silent for a moment, Seto understanding that he had acted a bit rash. He just lost control, thinking what the man had done to his puppy.

 

“Why won’t you just leave him?”

 

“Yeah right, and go where? Besides, it’s not as easy as it seems. I still care for my father. He never hits me when he’s sober and he always apologizes afterwards.”

 

“That’s no excuse.” The blonde wanted to shoot something back, but then remembered what the brunette had said when he thought that Joey was asleep and softened.

 

“You didn’t leave either, did you?”

 

Seto closed his eyes. He hated to remember those times, hated to think about Gozabura and what he’d done. He loved the mutt, be he couldn’t possibly explain everything that he had felt, had gone through, had done. The fear, the shame, the anger, the strange feeling that he maybe deserved it all somehow, then the rage and the guilt.

 

Kaiba clenched his fists, bowed his head and most of the color was gone from his face. The blonde hadn’t seen him like this ever before and it hurt. He carefully placed his hand on the brunette’s shoulder, feeling the boy wince.

 

“Seto, there is no need to feel ashamed or guilty about it.” Joey had tried to sooth him, but his words had triggered a chain reaction of feelings, that the CEO couldn’t hold in anymore.

 

“Not feel guilty? You have no idea what I’ve done! Don’t you understand? It was not an accident!” Kaiba jumped from his chair.

 

The blonde was very confused at the sudden outburst and didn’t understand what the CEO was talking about.

 

“I killed him you idiot! After he’d made me an heir of a multimillion company, after he adopted me and my brother.”

 

The anger was gone as soon as it had come. Seto suddenly looked ten years older and extremely tired, as if the weight of the world had been on his shoulders for all these years and now he had let it drop, destroying everything. Even his voice sounded far away, faded somehow.

 

“Do you understand it now? I’m a monster. These hands are covered in blood, maybe that’s why everything I touch turns to shit. But I don’t want to hurt you, so I think it would be better if you’d stay away from me.” With that he took his coat and walked out of the door, leaving a shocked Joey behind.

 

****

 

Seto was sitting by the waterside, throwing little stones at the almost frozen surface. He was thinking of how he had managed to destroy something again. He really had hoped that this would last longer than most of his flings, because this time he really cared about someone. But it was no use, he’d just keep on driving people away with his cold attitude and his past. Looking at the water, he dreamed for a moment how it would feel to just jump in there, letting the cold do the work, leaving the pain behind, feeling nothing. Those thoughts weren’t long, because he knew that suicide was weak and he had responsibilities. Then he thought about Joey, the way he looked, the way he was, the way he made him smile.

 

 “If you stay sitting here, you’ll freeze to death,” came a familiar voice. He saw a pair of sneakers coming closer and stop next to him.

 

“Who let you go outside in your condition?”

 

“Oh, I’m feeling better, the tranquilizers are out of my system. Besides, I told the nurse that if she wouldn’t take me to look for you I’d go anyway.”

 

Kaiba snorted. Typical Joey behaviour. “I thought I told you to stay away from me? And don’t go…” But it was too late, the blonde already sat down on the frozen ground beside him.

 

“Like I ever listen to you.” Seto hid a smile at that, then glared at Joey. The puppy looked not the way he sounded, he looked a bit sad and caring, that look made the CEO turn away. Joey would have none of that. He took the brunette’s chin and turned his face towards him.

 

“Don’t turn away from me. Listen to what I have to say. I’m not judging you. You had your reasons to do what you’ve done. As for staying away from you; I can’t do that. I can’t and won’t lose you. You’ve become too important to me.” Kaiba blushed. The blonde gathered all his courage and swallowed, before saying what he meant to say. “You’re not a monster. I know that , because I love you.” Seto looked surprised at him, but before he could say anything, Joey took his face in his hands and kissed him deeply, showing everything he felt through that kiss.

 

When they broke apart, Kaiba hugged him and whispered. “I don’t want to lose you either.”

 

****

 

Three days later Joey was ready to be released from the hospital. He was dressed and lying on his bed, waiting until he could leave, when there was a knock on his door.

“Come in.”

 

The door opened and Seto and Mokuba came in, both with broad smiles on their faces. The CEO smiling? That couldn’t be a good thing, Joey thought.

 

“We have talked about it yesterday and we have a proposition to make,” the brothers looked at each other and then back at the blonde “What would you think of coming to live with us?”

 

Joey’s jaw dropped. “Are you serious?” The brothers nodded in unison.

“Jeez, I don’t know…”

 

“Please say yes, otherwise big brother would have to kidnap you,” interrupted Mokuba.

 

The blonde snorted. “I’d like to see him try.” But before he knew what happened, he was lifted off the bed by the Seto, draped over his shoulder and carried out of the door.

 

“Hey, what the hell you think ya doin’?! Put me down you brute!” But Seto wasn’t listening, he had seen the happy expression on his puppy’s face when they told him the news and that was enough encouragement for him.

 

“Mokuba, tell him to put me down!” Mokuba only chuckled. “Please?

Somebody…?”

 

 

/ But I think that I love you  
I know that I do  
I just need you  
To help me, help me be good to you  
Help me, help me be good to you  
Help me, help me be good to you/

(Heather Nova – Help me be good to you)


	7. Epilogue

/ I'm coming I'm coming home to you  
I'm alive, I'm a mess  
I can't wait to get home to you,  
To get warm, warm and undressed

[...]

/ And when somebody knows you well  
Well there's no comfort like that  
And when somebody needs you  
Well there's no drug like that

 

So keep me, keep me  
In your bed all day, all day  
Nothing heals me like you do  
Keep me, keep me  
In your bed all day, all day  
Nothing heals me like you do /

(London rain, Heather Nova)

 

 

I put my suitcase on the doorstep and search my pockets for my keys. Finally finding them, I open the door and step inside. I’ve just spent the last ten hours traveling and to say I’m tired would be the understatement of the year. My first intention is to go upstairs and sleep, very long, but then I hear voices coming from the living room and can’t resist taking a look. I was away for a week on a business trip. They expect me to return tomorrow, but I didn’t want to wait that long.

 

I see them on the ground, playing twister. Mokuba will win, he always wins. He is very flexible and his movements are very catlike, while Joey’s are…hmm, no, too easy. I chuckle and they notice me. The blonde turns his head in my direction and lands on his butt. Mokuba just jumps up and leaps at me, almost knocking me out with one of his enthusiastic hugs.

 

“Seto! You’re back already!”

 

Joey has scrambled from the floor and is approaching me now. I hug my little brother back and look up at my puppy. Mokuba releases me and the blonde wraps his arms around my waist.

 

“Well, go on you two, I know you wanna kiss.”

 

“Mokuba!” we both react. Then we smile. I really do want to kiss him, but not in front of my little brother. Joey was probably thinking the same, because he blushes.

 

“Why are you back earlier, did something happen?” asked Mokuba.

 

“No, it went ok. I just didn’t want to stay there, so I took an early flight here.”

 

“That means you haven’t slept at all,” the blonde looked accusingly at me.

 

“Well, erm, who needs sleep anyway?”

 

“Whatever. Come on, let me take that,” he picks up my suitcase and places a foot on the stairs. “Let’s get you to bed, otherwise you’ll probably collapse soon enough.”

I want to give him a witty comeback, but right at that moment my body decides to betray me and I yawn. So I don’t have any other option, than to follow him up the stairs.

 

As I walk, I find myself thinking of how my life has changed recently. Joey has lived here for almost two months now and especially in the beginning it was strange. Like suddenly stumbling upon him in the bathroom at night after working until late or dropping him off at school. But it doesn’t matter if it’s strange, we’ll get used to it, because I don’t want to lose those great new experiences, like waking up beside him or walking into my room at night, seeing him asleep on my bed, his clothes still on, because he was waiting for me. It is amazing to have someone to come home to, of course I love my brother, don’t get me wrong, but this is just different. Someone who’ll give you a headache, just trying to figure him out, but who also will massage my shoulders when I’m tired or make me laugh when I’m sad. Someone to love and be loved back.

 

I’m woken from my musings as we reach my bedroom and Joey closes the door. He wraps his arms around my waist and places a soft kiss on my lips. I kiss back, but more hungrily. I’ve missed him and it’s ok for him to know that. He responds immediately and starts to peel my coat off me. The suitcase is forgotten at the door, as we move towards the bed, discarding clothes on the way. We are naked by the time we land on the bed and Joey suddenly flips me on my stomach.

 

“Hey!”

 

“Just relax, you’re way too tense.” He leans over me and gets a bottle of massage oil from the nightstand. Then moves back and straddles me, pouring a generous amount of the clear fluid on my back. I shiver at the cold and at the contact with his skin. He starts to rub my shoulders and my back, kissing and licking my ear at the same time. I moan into the cushion. He knows all my sensitive spots and always uses them too.

 

His hands are now kneading my lower back and he starts to nip at my neck. I shiver at the dual assault and shift on the bed. My position is starting to grow a bit uncomfortable, considering my growing arousal. He notices and allows me to turn around. Then straddles my hips again, so that our erections brush each other. We both let out a moan and he leans in to kiss me. He massages my shoulders, sides and stomach, while trailing his kisses down over my throat and stopping to suck on my collarbone. I bite my lip and arch my back, thrusting against him.

 

“Joey come on, stop teasing.”

 

“This isn’t teasing…,” he replies and then drags his fingernails gently over my inner thigh and sucks on one of my nipples. I grab a fistful of sheets and arch my back, “…this is teasing.”

 

“Joey!”

 

But then his fingers are on my erection, slicking it in with oil and in no time he lowers himself on me and we both cry out from the sensation. My hands roam his body as he sets up a steady rhythm. As much as I try to hold back, I find myself thrusting up against him. There is just us, him and me and the rest doesn’t matter. Only our ragged breaths and our skin. Just this feeling of finally finding the one thing that maters. I wrap my hand around his cock and pump him in time with his and my thrusts. After a few seconds he releases and I follow immediately. I pull out of him and he slumps down next to me. I wrap my arms around him and pull him close. I’m never letting him go, because this is where we both belong. In each other’s arms. We may not be able to heal our own wounds, but we can try to heal each other’s.


End file.
